astolat (astolat) wrote,
astolat
astolat

*THOR* primer!

OKAY PEOPLE HERE WE GO, EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT *THOR* TO ENJOY

0) The Norse gods are actually an advanced alien civilization that happen to look like people, talk like Vikings* and mostly fight in armor and with axes and magic and things. The Bifrost (the rainbow bridge of Norse mythology) is a wormhole that goes to a bunch of planets.

* That is, with British accents and the occasional pseudo-medieval turn of phrase thrown in. I am sure this is very historically accurate.

1) This is Thor, excuse me, *THOR*:

*THOR*

Do not be fooled by the chiseled abs. Thor is basically a big golden retriever puppy who occasionally flips out and kills people evil giants and robots.

2) This is Loki:

Loki

Loki is Thor's little brother, and also a master of magic. As you might expect from the god of mischief, he likes to mess with people. Also turns out to be a sad emo woobie, wait for it.

3) There are some other people in the movie also:

Odin -- King of Asgard and Thor and Loki's dad, aka Anthony Hopkins

Sif -- awesome female warrior who is Thor's gf in the comics and his wife in the mythology, where she also possibly hooked up with Loki (at least Loki claims she did). She doesn't actually do much in the movie but stars in a bunch of awesome Loki/Sif stories.

Jane Foster -- astrophysicist on Earth, Thor's -- true love? something anyway, played by Natalie Portman, whom I have still not forgiven for her part in the Star Wars prequels. :P

Heimdall -- mysterious, stoic, and clairvoyant god who has control over the Bifrost (aka the Stargate) and who totally sees through Loki. He also doesn't get much to do in the movie but is played by the awesome Idris Elba.


4) Here is the totally not at all Loki-centric plot of the movie:

GIANT PILE OF SPOILERSCollapse )

THERE YOU GO, now you can read norsekink and the Thor fic on the AO3 and watch talitha78's vid:




***THOR***!

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