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May 2015

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Thirty Below, SG: Atlantis, Sheppard/McKay

This story is not the one I have been working on for two fucking weeks. That one is at 23,000 words and counting. Kill me now. Or better yet, kill julad, who keeps inflicting more plot ideas on me. This woman must be stopped, I tell you.

In the meantime, I share this small plotless bit, which manages in less than a thousand words to cover not one but *two* cliches I have already hit in other Stargate stories. Plus, it is arguably a Canadian shack story. But whatever, there is nothing new under the sun. *g*

ETA: just to note, this isn't connected to the larger story. It is stress relief from the larger story.

Many thanks to cesperanza, resonant8, and julad for beta!

Thirty Below, Sheppard/McKay
Spoilers for Sanctuary, takes place some vague time after that episode.
Summary: Not on the list.


Thirty Below
by shalott

Considering he was in an unheated shed and it was probably thirty below outside, John woke up feeling pretty damn good: warm, relaxed, head pillowed on somebody's shoulder, a big hand stroking his back. Then he noticed that a little more clearly. He'd climbed in with McKay and layered the blankets over them sometime during the night; he vaguely remembered doing it.

That part wouldn't have been a big deal, but what he didn't remember was when he'd gotten hot enough after that to throw off his jacket and t-shirt, or when he'd draped himself over Rodney like a rug. And now both of them were kind of hard, so this was about to get seriously embarrassing unless he could get them untangled before McKay woke up.

John propped his hands carefully on either side of the pillow and slowly tried to lift himself off. But it didn't work; McKay picked his head up abruptly, jerking to a stop about two inches away from John's face. His hand stopped moving.

Great. "Look, McKay," John began.

"What, me?" McKay said incredulously, staring at him. "You started with J. Lo from outer space, and I'm next on your list? Do you even have a type, or is breathing good enough?"

"Hey!" John said. "Will you get over the damn thing with Chaya already? And you are not on my list, you are nowhere near my list, if I even had one!"

"I bet you keep it on your computer! With checkboxes or something -- astrophysicist comes right after alien. Get off me!"

"I was just trying to when you woke up!" John gritted his teeth and tried to get up again with a grunt.

"I didn't say get off, I said get off me!" McKay managed to thrash in exactly the wrong direction and yank the blankets tight so John sprawled flat onto him again. "Oh, I can't believe this. You know, even if I wanted you, do you think I would lower myself -- "

"What? Lower yourself?" John said. "Listen, you son of a bitch -- "

"Insults, that's smooth," McKay said. "Does this technique usually work for you? Some verbal abuse, a little groping -- "

"I'm not hitting on you!"

"No wonder you have to rape defenseless astrophysicists," McKay said.

"Goddamnit, I was cold!" John said, struggling to get his arms loose.

"Of course, you were cold," McKay said, rolling his eyes. "I should have guessed that from the way you took off all your clothes before you started molesting me. Did you really think all you needed to do was hump me a few times and I'd say yes?"

"Yes, Rodney, that was it!" John said. "I thought to myself, we're offworld; we've got a private room, a little chilly maybe, but hey, it's early and we've got nothing better to do; I bet McKay would make out with me. But obviously you're not interested, so -- "

"Oh, fine, don't get huffy," McKay said.

"What?" John said, which was all he had time for before McKay rolled them over. And he hadn't been anything like warm before, not compared to this, with McKay's body smothering him into the cocoon of blankets and his mouth, God, morning-bitter but hot as a furnace, and his hand curling around the back of John's neck, tilting his head to just the right angle.

And only McKay could actually believe somebody was that hot for him, and he absolutely deserved to be shoved out of bed, except there was the slide of his tongue into John's mouth, the sweet pressure of his thigh, right there, and they really didn't have anything better to do. John groped for the zipper on McKay's shirt and yanked it open so he could pull Rodney down chest to chest, spread out his hands all over Rodney's back, feel the heat of his muscles working under the skin.

Rodney unzipped them both, and they worked their pants down; too cold to bother stripping all the way. Rodney was already thrusting against him, way ahead, coming: quick hot spurts all over John's stomach. Rodney crumpled but kept moving against him, breathing in humid gasps against his neck, and John wrapped his arms around his back and rubbed himself off until he came.

"You were cold?" Rodney said afterwards, still into John's neck and still collapsed on top of him. "That was the best line you could come up with? Seriously, stick with honesty."

"Yeah," John said. "I'll do that."

# End


Comments always much appreciated. *g*

Comments

<3

I'm trying to find the words and also trying to restrain them so I don't babble too much, but this is just adorable. Hot, sarcastic, biting and just lovely -- everything that Sheppard and McKay should be. Astrophysicist comes after alien. *snicker*

There should really be more Atlantean shack stories.
There should really be more Atlantean shack stories.

I agree!!

*pokes*
but but but but

can't someone else write them?
OMG, I just realized, your icon here -- puddlejumper landed on a planet -- that *is* an Atlantean shack. See, it is destiny. You must write one now.
Okay, that's just unfair. No, no and, yeah, okay.

*sigh*

Willpower of a limp nooddle. That's me.

can I at least blame you for it? ;)
*freely accepts blame*
*mutter*grumble*bitch*moan*

so blaming you for the fact I already have a smidge of an idea.
*beams*
you know, I'm being realy backwards about this minion thing. how did getting people to do my bidding turn into me doing other peoples? hmph.

now, if I can ever get past them bickering we might be getting somewhere. *pokes Sheppard and McKay* give me something slashy to work with, not Donner party comments, damn you.
The loveliest thing about this is that it is so very in character. The voices were very clear to me straight through. :) Very nice!

I am such. a. dork.

I haven't even read the story yet, but I felt the need to let you know something. As soon as I scrolled down to this post (on the Te's fabulous friendlist) I let out the most undignified noise ever. The mere thought, 'Shalott wrote a new McKay/Sheppard' caused me to squee right out loud. As I type this, my husband is still laughing at me for making noises only dogs can hear. He may also be pointing. I refuse to look and give him the satisfaction.

Now I shall go *read* the story! Actual feedback to follow. Hee!

Re: I am such. a. dork.

Ahahahahah. Okay, seriously, I didn't even realize it was a bit of a larger story. I did not even get past the subject line before posting the above. And now you have melted my brain with the hotness of your perfect, perfect Rodney. I just. Gah. With the warm under a blanket in a cold room/tent/shack... and the sudden!how-did-this-happen!?sex... and the skin-on-skin, but still partially clothed... and, and, and. Will you come live wih me and tell me stories every night? Please? I'm a really good cook, and both my cat and my husband are friendly and well-trained.

To sum up: I love your Rodney, I love your John, I love your writing, I love you. Be my belated Valentine?

Re: I am such. a. dork.

Hee! Thank you! I am pleased to have produced squeaky noises. *grins* (Also, I realize now that my notes are unclear! This isn't actually a piece of the giant story, it's just a bit of smut that I wrote as stress relief *from* the giant story. *g*)
"I didn't say get off, I said get off me!"

*snicker*

Thanks!
*snicker*

Canadian shacks rule!
Hee. Very enjoyable!
"What, me?" McKay said incredulously, staring at him. "You started with J. Lo from outer space, and I'm next on your list? Do you even have a type, or is breathing good enough?"

I love this line! And the voices throughout were just perfect.
*dies*
*reads again*
*dies*
Because this is the way they WOULD hook up.
oh my god, this is wonderful. and the last line, just perfect.

this is *so* rodney: ""Oh, fine, don't get huffy," McKay said." i love that. you've written these characters as so very much themselves.

sending you good writing thoughts, and best wishes for the longer story too. i'm looking forward to reading it. *g*
And only McKay could actually believe somebody was that hot for him

LOL

Love it.
:snicker:
No one makes me love cliches like you.

I'm really going to need an Atlantis icon.
*laughing*

*applauds*
... but I hardly said anything!! ;)
Oh, this was good! *g*
I blame you for so much. Pitch Perfect Rodney is high on that list.

Aah. So. Hot.
"Do you even have a type, or is breathing good enough?"

BWAHAHAHAHA! God I love Rodney.
Heee! Great. Sex *and* no need to suspend disbelief. I like it!
Delightful!
hehe, that was funny and rodney... :)
i podficced this one. :)

again, thank you for writing it, and for the permission.

it's posted here: http://community.livejournal.com/sgapodfic/55340.html

also, raz0rgirl made a cover for the m4b - it's here: http://raz0rgirl.livejournal.com/41656.html
Love this.